Category: 2011

2011 Sunrise

Argent: What do you think this year will be like? Cyn: The same as last year. Argent: Everyone is making resolutions to improve themselves. Don’t you have faith all those individuals will meet their goals, and with those improvements make this year better than last? Cyn: No. Argent: Ever the cynic, I see. Cyn: Yep.

An Artist

Cyn: What if the world was created by an artist? No matter how hard we looked, we could never find them, because they would be outside our world. Like the difference between an author and their book. You would have to watch what you say, because the artist might hear you. A few lines there,… Read more »

The Sound of Installation

Cyn: “Do not use the supplied installation CD-ROM in regular CD players. It produces excessively loud sound that may cause hearing damage.” Well now I’m curious.

Eventually

Cyn: Stop! If you do that, you will die. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually. Argent: Well, yes.

3 Years Old

Cyn: Happy birthday! I had your cake and I ate it, too.

Where Complaints Go

Bingo: But I – Cyn: Sorry, you’ll have to file that with the complaints department.

2011 Valentines

Valentine: Valentine’s day isn’t about love, it’s about supporting a multi-million dollar industry. Happy capitalism! Valentine: This oughta be good. Happy Valentines Day!

Always a Critic

Argent: No matter what you do or how good it is Cyn will always have something negative to say about it. Cyn: That is not true!

Button

Bingo: Captain Cyn… Captain Cyn, we have a problem. I… I… I can’t remember which button I’m not supposed to press!

Tomorrow’s Forecast

Weather Forecaster: Taking a look at today’s weather forecast, sunny with highs around 70. Tomorrow’s weather forecast: firestorms sweep across the nation as we head into the first day of the apocalypse.

Nothing to Say

Cyn: After 20 years of friendship, after 30 years of marriage, after a lifetime of family… You would think people would run out of things to say to each other, but they never do. Why is that? Argent: ran out a long time ago

Irish Whistle

Cyn: The “Irish whistle.” A whistle only the Irish can hear.

Brainwashed

Cyn: I don’t understand why brainwashing is a big concern. You’d think if your brain was dirty you would want it washed.

This Side Up

Bingo: Hey Argent, which way is up? Argent: What? Bingo: Oh… It’s just that I’m really bad with directions. Really bad.

Eye Exam

Eye Doctor: Spell cucumber. Cyn: C-U-C-U-M-B-E-R Eye Doctor: Okay, now spell egregious. Cyn: E-G-R-E-G-I-O-U-S Eye Doctor: Your vision is fine. There’s nothing to worry about. Cyn: Uhh…

Flash

Waiter: I’ll be back in a flash with your order.

Evil

Cyn: An evil so great it fills the universe with darkness. Something so terrible, not even 90° can set it right! A careless, unsentimental horror! A being with no perceptible feelings! Dun dun dunnnn! Argent: I can’t see you Cyn, but I know you are back there.

School’s Out

High School Graduates: Schoooooool’s out for summer! Schoooooool’s out for… ever! Woo-hoo! Dog State College Graduate: Aw, *^&#.

Typos

Typos are Everywhre.

Crazy Driving

Cyn: Life is very much like driving. If you drive like a crazy person, then every one else, fearing for their continued existence, will get out of your way.

You will pay for this!

Retail Husky: You will pay for this. Bingo: I already did. Retail Husky: Oh. Never mind then.

You Know What They Say

Cyn: Who are they? Why do they keep saying things? And why am I supposed to know about it?

Free Parking

Cyn: I like to think the parking police will assume I have the right sticker if I leave them all on my window. They’re expired, but you have to look close to know!

Telemarketers

Argent: Hello? Telemarketer: Hello, this is Spot from Hydrant Services. How are you? Argent: Oh, today has been quite dreadful. I feel sick. This morning I also smashed my paw in the doorway and tripped over a mess my friends left in the main hall. I then discovered the milk was spoiled when I went… Read more »

911

Bingo: Remember, if there’s an emergency, call… Raúl: Bingo: Hey Cyn, what’s the number for 911? Cyn: You know Bingo, I can’t quite remember.

Tech Tip

Cyn: Here’s a useful tech tip: while it may be satisfying, smashing your computer is ultimately unproductive.

Stupid Comment

Cyn: Ooh, a comment on my video. ‘I can’t tell you how stupid this is.’ A bigger vocabulary might help.

Speedometers

Cyn: The fastest an average U.S. citizen can legally drive is 70-75 mph. So why do speedometers go so high? The more I look at it, the more I want to try…

A Word

Cyn: And now, a word from our sponsor. Argent: Orange. Cyn: We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Proof of Purchase

Argent: What are you doing? Cyn: Collecting “proof of purchase” labels from things I didn’t purchase. ha Ha Ha Ha~ Argent: Evil, thy name is Cyn.

Tale Please, Hold the Fairies

Bingo: What story do you want to start tonight: Jack and the Beansprout, James and the Generic Peach, or Harry Potter and the Chamber of Commerce?

The World Will Never Know

Bingo: I wonder what it’s like to have short term memory lo Argent: What? Bingo: ??? I didn’t say anything.

Captcha

Cyn: I hate captchas. Today I will show you why. The evolution of hte captcha: fish hook fish hook fssh yook Cyn: ???

Cooking 101

Cyn: The plot thickens. Argent: Well, it wouldn’t do that if you quit adding so much flour.

No Offense Guys

Cyn: Here’s a fun fact. People only ever say ‘no offense’ right before something that is clearly offensive. No offense, but you’re boring. No offense, but that’s a stupid idea. Well, you know what? Bingo, Argent, Cyn: I’m still offended!

Dexter

Cyn: I get nervous when I watch TV shows about psychopaths. I think maybe I am one… and if I watch it on TV, then I’ll realize… Argent: Didn’t you just say you were busy? You should probably get going… Bingo: Well, if we’re done here I just remembered I have something to go do…

No Escape

Cyn: Make your day more challenging. Park in an automated parking garage and lose your parking ticket. Parking Garage: please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket

Trick OR Treat

Cyn: ‘Trick-or-Treat’ implies you get either a trick or a treat. And since everybody else gives out treats guess what the kids visiting this house are gonna get.

Heads Together

Cyn: Looks like we’ll have to put our heads together to figure this out. Bingo: But I don’t want to touch your head with my head… Cyn: I didn’t mean literally.

If Lawyers Wrote This

Legal Notice: This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, events, or places is entirely coincidental, except some times when the resemblance is on purpose. Walls drawn in this comic are not actual walls, but representations thereof. Cyn wolf does not claim to own or hold the rights… Read more »

Thankful

Thanksgiving: Reminding you to be thankful you’re at the top of the food chain.

The Glass

Bingo: The glass is half full. Argent: The glass is half empty. Cyn: The glass is broken.

Only Option

Facebook: This message could not be posted to your wall. Okay. Cyn: No, not okay!

Your Whole Life

Bingo: It’s okay if you don’t know what you want to be yet, Raúl. You have the rest of your life to figure it out. For all we know, ‘the rest of your life’ might only be the next two minutes, but…

Gruel

Cyn: How, exactly, does one make ‘gruel’? Is there a recipe? If there is, I really want to know…